December 2009
42 posts
Highlights From Yesterday's Disneyland Trip
- Seeing David, Eric, and Alex for the first time in years + meeting Alex’s girlfriend Nodira
- Tiana’s Steamboat Jubilee (managed to retroactively make me like The Princess and the Frog more)
- Nonsensical quote from David in New Orleans Square: “Turn the Gumbo Dial to Jambalaya.”
- David taking my suggestion that he accessorize his pirate sword by wearing...
cocktailscast:
Episode 6 - Happy Winter...
How This First Christmas Without My Mom Is Going
chriskelly:
My Sister: I think it would be fun to go horseback riding sometime…
My Dad: Do you want a horse? I’ll buy you a horse. Let’s go buy a horse for you.
This is why Chris Kelly is one of my best friends.
“If you like to make things out of wood, or sew, or dance, or style...”
– Happy Monthly Mister Rogers Quote Day, everyone.
“As always, the show reflects the culture it ostensibly lampoons; the tweens have...”
– Nathan Rabin, on SNL’s current season
1 tag
Mom Bought a Winestopper
Mom: I bought this new wine stopper.
Me: Neat.
Mom: You leave it in and you can pour from it.
Me: Neat. Of course, it shares a name with a vibrator.
Mom: What?
Me: "The Rabbit." It's a vibrator too.
Mom: Oh.
Me: It kinda looks like it too.
Mom: Well, hey, double duty.
Me: Yeah.
Mom: Of course, I wouldn't want to drink wine out of it afterward.
Me: No.
Mom: ...
Me: ...
Mom: ...
Me: This gets grosser the more I think about it.
Mom: I know. You're the one who brought it up!
Me: I know! Why did I do that?!
3 tags
Everyone Woke Up Angry
So I wake up this morning, check my e-mail, and then log onto Twitter. And what do I see, but multiple posts of people being more than a little angry at Obama. Angry about the death of the Public Option and angry about the escalation in Afghanistan.
Hey, guys?
Our system of government is more complicated than this. Obama did what he could for the Public Option. The mere fact that it’s only...
“Humility in this business isn’t just a matter of being polite, it’s kind of a...”
– Michael Shannon, The A.V. Club’s Random Roles
cocktailscast:
Ep. 5.5 - The Leftovers From...
For God's Sake, Get Your Shots Already, Will You? →
Dear Person Running the Newsweek Tumblr:
Keep up the good work.
Signed,
Lindsay Katai
(via newsweek)
Wikipedia's Featured Article of the Day: George... →
This article will jump in your face and declare its superiority to other Featured Articles. I’m talking “Chess Master.” I’m talking “King of the Wooden Spoonists.” I’m talking the “Jew of Chamant.” I’m talking the word “grandpatzer.”
George H. D. Gossip, I will write a twee musical about you and it will make me upwards of...
Canvassing V
This is how today went:
“You should give up. You can’t make a difference.”
“I hope you fail. I really do.”
“You can’t even take the good advice of someone who wants to help you. No wonder you don’t have health insurance!”*
*This particular gem was from a woman who, when I told her I was working to pass the health care reform bill, nearly...
Dave Holmes Watched Glenn Beck's 'The Christmas... →
Ugh. UGH. UGGGGHHHHHH! UUUGGHHHHAARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! TTTTHHHHHHAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHRRRRRPPPPPPPFFFFFFTTTTTTTTGGGHHHHH!
Ugh.
Avatar
Avatar is like the prettiest girl in school who doesn’t know it and so she sleeps with everyone.
What I’m trying to say is that Avatar just fucked Bones to make itself feel pretty.
Canvassing IV
Me: So you don’t have even five dollars? Him: Nope. Me: Okay, well thank you for your time. (Cut to an hour later, when I’m working the other side of the street and I see him lifting a barbell in front of his giant picture window overlooking the Pacific Ocean. There’s not anything ironic or especially quirky about that, but what a douchebag, right?)
Canvassing III
Me: The important thing is just that you give as generously as you can, so that we can keep making a big impact.
Man: Yeah, I’m with you. I just really can’t do anything right now. Money’s really tight.
(Man closes door to McMansion, goes back to watching Family Guy on his wall-mounted HD TV.)
Ten Things To Know About Rome
chriskelly:
1. Beyonce is called Beyonce Knowles here. It’s confusing, I know.
2. The ancient Romans used to save their pee and then recycle it in laundry detergent.
3. There is an archway that is roped off so people won’t take pictures under it. This is because it commemorates the Romans’ triumph over the Jews, and when Hitler visited Rome, it was the first and only thing he took a picture in...
Canvassing II
Me: As you know, health care costs are out of control. Families and businesses are paying more each year--
Super Nice Man: You seem like a good person.
Me: Thank you.
Super Nice Man: Are you staying safe out here tonight?
Me: Yes. Very safe.
Super Nice Man: I teach martial arts.
Me: ...
Super Nice Man: You'd think my weapon of choice would be the gun, but I prefer knives.
Me: ... cool ...
Super Nice Man: Did you say your last name was French?
Me: I didn't say my last name.
Canvassing
Me: Hi. My name is Lindsay and I'm with CalPIRG. Right now we're working to fix the high cost of health care.
Obviously Gay Man: I don't care what the homosexuals do, so long as I don't have to pay for it.
Me: ?!